HD Wallpapers on tenwallpaper.com
New Hot Today's best This week's best This month's best Popular
Divorced & Drunk

A man and his wife are at a restaurant, and the husband keeps staring at an old drunken lady swigging her gin at a nearby table. His wife asks, "Do you know her?" "Yes," sighs the husband. "She's my ex-wife. She took to drinking right after w...

Goverment Wrestling Federation

    13> Driving your fellow Congressman into the turnbuckle now considered acceptable method of ending a filibuster.     12> President now shouts entire State of the Union address with his face 18 inches fr...

Some Short Doctor Jokes

WE've got a whole slew of great Doctor Jokes that have submitted by our loyal F&J readers, though many of them just aren't quite long enough to publish by themselves. We've taken a few and compiled them here, just for you : ) "Docto...

Murphy’s Logic

One day Murphy was outside and was mowing his grass when a big moving truck pulled in the driveway next to his. Knowing that no one lives there he figures that he is getting new nieghbor's. He finishes up his grass and the neighbor's are unloadin...

Sexy Panties

My frustrated wife decided our sex life needed alittle spicing up. So, after work she went shopping and picked up a fancy pair of crotchless panties. She went home and slid the new garment on and selected a short skirt to go with it. ...

Even More “You Might Be A Redneck If” Foxworthy Jokes

You Might Be a Redneck IF... (By Jeff Foxworthy) . . . your wife puts Bean-O on everything you eat. . . . your dog rides in the front seat and your kids ride in the back. . . . you taught your children how to play “Pull My Finger.â...

Married Bar Talk

Two married buddies are out drinking one night when one turns to the other and says, "You know, I don't know what else to do Whenever I go home after we've been out drinking, I turn the headlights off before I get to the driveway. I shut off the ...

Fight Like a Man

Three men were sitting in a bar talking about how whipped they had their wives. The first two kept bragging about how they could get their wives to do anything. They looked at the third man and he said, "I have my wife so whipped that the oth...

Marriage Is About Celebration

An aged farmer and his wife were leaning against the edge of their pig-pen when the old woman wistfully recalled that next week would mark their golden wedding anniversary. “Let’s have a party, Ralph,” she suggested. “L...

Witty College Professor

A college professor had just finished explaining an important research project to his class. He emphasized that this paper was an absolute requirement for passing his class, and that there would be only two acceptable excuses for being late. Thos...

Blowing Bubbles

Three ducks went into court. The judge called the first one to the stand. "What is your name?" he asked. "Quack." the duck answered. "And why were you arrested?" the judge asked. "I was blowing bubbles." he answered. The judge didn't se...

Golf Rules For Beginners

Being an avid golfer myself, like most I enjoy pushing my knowledge onto those who don't really want to hear it. My friends like to call me a "fountain of knowledge", so today's your lucky day! There are a few things about golf you need to kno...

Redneck Personal Hygiene

Unlike clothes and shoes, a toothbrush should never be a hand-me-down item. If you have to vacuum the bed, it's time to change the sheets. While ears need to be cleaned regularly, this is a job that should be done in private using one's OWN...

Yo Mama Is So Black

Yo mama so black, every time she gets in a car the oil light comes on.  Yo mama so black, if she sat in a Jacuzzi the water would turn into coffee.  Yo mama so black, she bleeds smoke.  Yo mama so black, she could show up naked to a f...

Two Mexicans are Stranded in the Desert

Two Mexicans are stranded in the desert, on their last leg, about to die of thirst. They stumble on, hoping for salvation in the form of an oasis or something, they suddenly spy through the heat haze a tree off in the distance. As they get clos...

Yo' Mama Is So Fat... Cat's Tail

Yo' Mama is so fat, she stepped on my cat's tail, and now I call him "Beaver."

California

Q: How many Northern Californians does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Hella.

Yo' Mama Is So Fat... Donut Shop

Yo' Mama is so fat, the donut shop accused her of stealing their jelly rolls.

Seasick

Mr. Johnson's wife of 50 years suggested they take a cruise: "We could go somewhere for a week, and make wild love like we did when we were young." He thought it over and agreed. He went to the pharmacy and bought a bottle of seasick pills and a...

Blonde Counting

Q: Why can't a blonde count to 70? A: Because 69 is a bit of a mouthful.

Belligerent Bear

A bear walks into a bar in Billings, Montana and sits down. He bangs on the bar with his paw and demands a beer. The bartender approaches and says, "We don't serve beer to bears in bars in Billings." The bear, becoming angry, demands again tha...

Blonde Puppies

Three women were sitting in a bar, (burnette, red head, and a blonde) and they were all pregnant. The burnette says, "I know what I'm going to have." The other to asked how she knew. She replied, "well I was on top when I concieved so I will ha...

Eileen Who?

This guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender looks at the guy and says" Have you seen Eileen?" The guy is rather confused and asked " Eileen who?" The bartender relies, "I lean over and you kiss my butt." Well the man was offe...

The Compassionate Lawyer

Driving through town in his BMW, a successful young lawyer spotted two man on the side of the road eating grass out of somebody's yard. Moved by how desperate the men had become, he pulls over to have a word with them, "Hey fellas, what is goin...

That’s A Fine Pig You’ve Got There

Farmers Brown and McDonald were sitting on Farmer McDonald's porch discussing plowing technique when Farmer Brown notices a pig with a wooden leg hobbling across the front yard. He turned to his friend and asks, "Say, Henry, how'd that pig get hi...

Bill Clinton, Al Gore, and Bill Gates Meet Their Maker

Bill Clinton, Al Gore, and Bill Gates all died in a plane crash and went to meet their maker. The supreme deity turned to Al and asked, tell what is important about yourself. Al responded that he felt that the earth was the ultimate importance a...

Poker One-Liners

Last night I got thrown out of a casino… apparently I completely misunderstood the crap table. In Vegas they'll bet on anything. One casino was ready to let me bet on whether I'd win or lose there. I'm going to the casino tonight. I ...

Little Johnny: Contagious In A Sentence

At school one day, Little Johnny's teacher asks the class to use the word "contagious" in a sentence... Cindy raises her hand. "Yes, Cindy?" She answers, "I was at the dentist's office with my mom, and she said not to play with the toys in the ...

No More Floppy Lips

A sexually active woman told her plastic surgeon that she wanted her vaginal lips reduced in size because they were too loose and floppy. Out of embarrassment, she insisted that the surgery be kept asecret, and the surgeon agreed. Awakening fro...

Hippie And The Nun

One day a hippie gets a ride on a public bus and sees a hot young nun. He sits down next to her and promptly asks if she would like to have sex, to which she immediately says no and walks off the bus. The bus driver leans over and says "Hey gu...

Keeping An Eye Out For The Doctor

John, two days before his scheduled visit to the proctologist, accidentally swallowed his glass eye when he was cleaning it. He was worried at first, but after calling his doctor and learning he probably won't get sick, he ordered another and soo...

And God Created Man

And God created woman. She had two arms, two legs and three breasts. And it was good. And God asked woman what she would like changed about herself. And she asked for her middle breast to be removed. And it was good. She stood with her th...

1 2 3 next
Ten Manga| Ninemanga.com| Niadd.com| Contact Us| Privacy Policy| Funny Pictrues| Jokes | Funny Videos| Back to Top
@2011-2015 NiAdd