HERO KILLER

“You know what’s cool? Being a superhero. You know what’s cooler than cool? Killing anyone in my way that makes me seem like less of a super cool superhero and tries to make me look like the chump that my former boss used to make me out to be, but I sure showed him when I deathrayed him and now who is the big man super hero? I am! That’s who! And everyone likes me! And if someone doesn’t, I will karate chop them so hard, they will change the word karate to Tim!!!” – Excerpt from Tim’s daily affirmation

IF YOU DON’T WANT ANY TROUBLE, DON’T GIVE SOMEONE THE KEY TO THE CITY AND THEN TAKE IT AWAY! IT’S AS SIMPLE AS THAT! WHY IS THAT SO HARD?! I’M SORRY I’M YELLING, I JUST FEEL VERY STRONGLY ABOUT THIS! (takes a deep breath) Okay, so Tim and crew are in even more trouble than they realize as their star is on the rise…and fall…and rise again? And it seems that maybe you just can’t deathray your way out of your problems…

Oh man oh man oh man! Okay! Everybody cool out! We just need a second here and we will figure this out. Or not. I don’t know. Tim and the gang messed up pretty big and I’m not sure how they are going to handle it. And not just them. How are the superheroes gonna deal with this? Captain Battle doesn’t seem too easygoing…not with a name like CAPTAIN BATTLE! Let’s just think about this logically. Maybe Sparky, Captain Battle Jr., and Tim can turn this monumental screw-up to their advantage. I mean, they have a lot of inside information and maybe a town without crime isn’t so great after all…

Welcome to Libertyville U.S.A.! Home of too damn many superheroes! Watch out, crime, here comes Captain Battle Jr.! And Sparky! And Tim! Yeah, you know…Tim! What? You’ve never heard of them? Huh. Well, it’s hard to be a sidekick when there is a city full of capes running around stopping every misdemeanor with a spandex wrapped flourish. Now watch as things get weird when three lad companions (totally not weird) try to get to the criminals before their bosses do! From the insanity-riddled minds of Ryan Browne (God Hates Astronauts) and Pete Woods (Robin, Deadpool). Prepare to feel the wrath of Tim!

Three words: Black Terror Returns! Three more words: Sentient Meat Hammer! Another set of three words: I love you! Wait. Forget that last set of words and think about this new set of words: It’s Vengeance Time! Do contractions count? Today they do!